Singapore in mind

Dulu everyday i used to go Sg
for the past 3 years i stopped
Then now i missed being at Sg again


entahla, lately ni the sudden feeling of being there lagi meronta-ronta. I want to visit kubur arwah bapak.
when i'm alone. i think of him. when i'm in the plane looking at the sky, i shed a tears, missing him. i just feel guilty. ni baru orang cakap, appreciate the person while she/he are still alive and not after.
i dont wanna think of what had happened previously. Past is past and we have to look forward.i just had this guilty feeling.
tak sempat jumpa arwah while di saat terakhir before menghembuskan nafas 
Rasa sangat jealous with 2 of my bro's coz they've seen him while his admitted. And ME? takde, tak sempat. In fact none informed me earlier on how sick he is. and because of that i feel really guilty.
For not being a good daughter. For not being able to be there for him. 
I feel ralat and terpinggir. 


I'm not the type of person yang jenis meluahkan or show off my loves to my loved one. I keep it in my heart. U may see me with a gila-gila attitude and smile and act like i'm OK but it's not. deep inside i have this cengeng attitude and ada bunga/taman dlm hati
Aku ni jenis cepat kesian and sedih over something


The best way is to sedekahkan arwah Al-fatihah but when the vivid memories appeared,
i'm sad and will shed a tears. Oh my, what happen to me?


When will my head stop flying on the sky and be on the ground again?